Steve Urkel lives in LA, he prefers for you to call him "J", and he smokes blunts

I got high with Steve Urkel and this is my story:

(By the way, he is smooth and good looking in person, not Urkel at all)

When I first moved to LA I called up everyone I know who lived there.  This one girl I went to high school with was having some people over on a Friday night.  I hadn’t seen her in a while and went there with my friend whose couch I was crashing on.  This was literally like my third night in LA, so I was kinda excited to see someone I knew.  

We get to her house and there are about seven people there.  She greets me at the door, we say hello, and she introduces me to people.  This black guy sitting on the couch gets up and says, “What’s up, I’m J.” I shake his hand and meet the others, make small talk and go into the kitchen to catch up with the girl I knew.  

As I walk into the kitchen, I get a what the hell feeling.  My buddy nudges me and says, you know who that is right? 

Huh? What?  

That’s Steve Urkel.  

In my head I’m like this is so weird, how do I act? He’s just chilling on the couch.  I really don’t know if I am supposed to ask a question on why he is here or what. 

Do I acknowledge that he is a celebrity? Do I make a big deal out of it? I think I mumbled, “oh really.” 

Apparently he had been dating the girl I knew for a while.  And I guess “J” is short for Jaleel White, his actual name.  So we walk back over to the sitting area.  I sit down across from Urkel and try to act normal.   We are all gathered around a table drinking and doing shots.  I am thinking to myself, does everyone else know he is Urkel? (like I said before, he is smooth and good looking in person, not Urkel at all). 

Anyway, there is a huge bag of weed on the table and Urkel starts rolling a blunt.  

I’m making small talk, where are you from, yadda yadda? People are asking me questions, and the whole time I am watching Urkel break the blunt, fill it with pot, lick it, and start lighting it.  No way I am about to smoke weed with Steve Urkel.  

He passes me the blunt and I take a couple hits, thinking my mouth is touching Urkel’s saliva.  I get super high and all I can think about is how the other people are acting towards him and that he fucks my friend.  I have so many questions about the whole situation.  I talk to him as much as I can without acknowledging who he actually is.  

Anyway, long story long I throw up in my buddy’s car on the ride home, wake up the next morning, and I go to my buddy, “That was weird, right?” He goes, “Yah, you’ll get used to it. That happens a lot in LA.”

I came to learn that knowing someone is a celebrity and trying to act normal is not a skill of mine.


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